When I started this blog, it was mainly for me. I never really dreamed anyone would want to listen to anything I might have to say. Soon after I started writing, we took our kids out of public school, and started this grand adventure called home education.
Most people around me thought {and still may think} we were crazy. Through other blogs I found like-minded families who also felt called by the Lord to teach their children at home. These blogs are where I found curriculum ideas, classroom ideas, examples of organization, and most of all-I found friendship.
In the world of blogging, we have our own voice, free to shout to the world. It’s a good thing- most of the time; but, amidst all of this feel-good, you can also find:
Egos. Peer pressure. Hurt feelings.
Things that hurt, isolate, and make you doubt who your friends are.
You’ve seen it too-
“You’re still on Blogger?” “Who do you write for?” “You do giveaways??”
{For the record- I just don’t like WordPress!!! I write for several other blogs, but I don’t have to. And I love giveaways!}
Then you have the bloggers where every single time you read, you wonder why you ever wanted to follow the blog in the first place. The one with a perfect life: perfect house, perfect children, perfect neighborhood. The one that knows no bad day.
I know I don’t excel in every area. I don’t have all of the parenting questions answered. My house is no longer spotless each day. I eat too much chocolate. {especially on bad days}
I trip. I cry. I fail.
I try to share my failings with you, along with a few victories.
Transparency is tough, but who wants to hang out with Miss Perfect anyway? I need some friends with junk in their closets too!
So I weed out the chaff.
I don’t continue to read blogs who never respond back. I don’t read blogs who only have fabulous days. I read the blogs whose writers convict me one day, and hug me the next. Not the airbrushed ones.
We can’t be real friends if we aren’t going to be real.
I want my blog to be a place to come and chat with a friend. I want to have good ideas and victories, but not every day starts {or ends} that way. Rejoice with me when I do something right {I can, I really can}, scrape me up when I am stuck on the floor, and tell me that God loves me anyway.
It isn’t about followers, subscribers, “likes”, or even comments. I love writing here because I love to write, and sharing with others makes me smile.
My online friends are a mix of big blogs, medium blogs, and itty-bitty blogs. Some have no blogs at all. I don’t care if you put your story on Blogger, WordPress, or Facebook-if you are my friend-I’ll follow you wherever you may go.
We need to be supportive, and real. How am I using my voice? To support, to encourage? I know I always have room to improve-that is the beauty of life. As for me, I am clinging to what feels most genuine. The rest I can leave behind.
“Oil and perfume make the heart glad, and the sweetness of a friend comes from his earnest counsel.” Proverbs 27:9
I am blessed to have some real friends who I may never meet, I cherish your friendship, and pray I bless you just a smidgen of what you bless me.
Lovely post, and echoes many of my thoughts. It’s hard to survive in the blogosphere when you feel bombarded by all sides. I’ve found that finding some friends and sticking with them is absolutely the way to go….I’m thankful that somehow {I quite forget how?} I found you :)
Aurie – great point. Sometimes “less is more”!
How did we “meet”? I guess it doesn’t matter- I am just grateful!
Sent from my iPad
Awwwww. ( HUG!) That was a nice, real, and touching post. Thank you!
coffee4mommy.blogspot.com
Thank you. <3
Sent from my iPad
Great post Sam, I have been having the same thoughts as I evaulate my blog for the new year. Keep on doing what your doing. I enjoy reading your posts and I am glad to have found your blog!
Yes, this post has been coming, and evaluation pushed it into reality. Thank you.
Sent from my iPad
Sam, I have enjoyed watching your blog grow and getting to know you better. Your organization and self discipline inspire me.
I think you are right about being supportive of each other, and even when we express differing opinions (mine on giveaways, for example) that is ok! The older I get the more I see examples of how being supportive and sometimes holding our tongue when we disagree is best. It doesn’t always come easy for me, though. ;-)
I appreciate how much of your heart you shared in this post.
Ha. I didn’t even know you are anti giveaway! I sometimes still struggle with my tongue, but don’t use my blog for rants. I think we have enough going against us!
Sent from my iPad
great minds think alike!!!!!!!!!!!!I am trying to redo my blog bc of the same reasons.I like to follow REAL people NOT fake bloggers that are trying to impress other bloggers.I enjoy your blog for so many reasons the first is homeschooling and next is your an inspiration to me through my weight loss,I havent been commenting BC my computer is messed up so I need to make it to the library and play catch up.I hav ejoined myfitnesspal and been logging calories and fitness for 30 days I am trying to lose 50 pounds and you have been there and I enjoy your posts when you like to post your sweaty pics,haha
Yay! Someone likes my sweaty pics!! Woohoo! My back has been out- so I missed a week of workouts, but I am going back tonight. Good luck with your goal-feel free to email me if you ever need anything.
Sent from my iPad
Jamie,
I think you will have great success logging calories. I used something similar (and still use when I need to) called Lose It. It works the same way as My Fitness Pal. Anyway, it’s kind of like budgeting your money. When you put it all down on paper and see where the money goes, you can finally get a handle on it. The same way with food. When I logged every single thing I ate, I was astonished at how many calories I was eating. I started measuring everything! One little tip. Allow yourself splurge days. Now, don’t go and eat everything in sight! but if you are attending a baby shower or supper at a friend’s house or something like that—just don’t log that day or that meal. It can be stressful trying to figure out what you can eat that you can measure and enter in the app. If you allow yourself a day here and there to just eat (within reason), than just jump back in to counting and logging those calories the very next day. I hope you are adding exercise to your calorie counting as well.
I wish you success!! :)
I have enjoyed getting to know you via your blog and email! Your blog is a delight to read. Like you, I first began blogging for me–actually I still blog mostly to record my families daily activities so I can go back and read about my life when I can no longer remember! Ha! It’s kind of like a digital scrapbook for me. Along the way I have picked up a few faithful readers, and while that can be flattering, I still blog mostly for me and my family. I pray that I can encourage my readers, but I certainly don’t have all the answers! I learn from people like you all the time. Isn’t it great that we have such a community?
Now, I can’t wait for your blog post about all the fabulous apps you have put on your iPad! :)
I have enjoyed getting to know you as well-and I am working on that post {in my head at least!}. Coming soon…
Beautiful post, my friend. And I can say that because we have cultivated that friendship of ours that started with our blogs and progressed to friendship.
Thank you for your authentic voice.
Thank you for your friendship. And your very transparent posts. <3
Beautiful post, Sam. You made me cry. Thanks for your friendship.
Thank you, sweet friend.
So true! I take a lot of grief in “real life” for homeschooling and I feel so blessed to have my online friends like you. I’m doing the same thing with who I’m following too. I started it following every one and now I’m trying to condense so I can be a better friend to those who are my friends. Wonderfully said!
Oh by the way – Blogger for life (I really don’t like Word Press). LOL
I <3 Blogger. :) And real friends-like you.
Love this post as it is so important to be comfortable in our own skin. To be honest, the way I grew up, you didn’t “fake” anything. For my family our honesty was partially cultural and the other half was socioeconomic (I grew up in poverty). At times I know (especially before I met Jesus in 1998) my ultra-honesty was very rude and hurtful. But so thankful for a loving God that came in and tempered me (and STILL IS working on my heart) and taught me how to walk in LOVE. Blogging has blessed me beyond comprehension, I am so glad I was obedient to God’s call for me start my blog this summer! He gets all the honor and glory for any GOOD thing in my life – and that includes YOU :) Blessings to you Sam as you continue to honor our KING!!
I could never be fake-and it either draws you in or away. I have had soooooo much work on my tongue. God and my husband keep pushing me to do better. Thank you, friend, for the comment.
Great job. I share your feeling that I am a woman of many imperfections and I’m all about keeping it real! Glad to consider you my online friend. :)
Thank you so much, Laura, my friend.
I LOVE this post!!! thanks for the hug today:) Oh and BLOGGER bloggers unite! :) lol
;) I love your comment! And-you’re welcome. ((hugs))
You are such an inspiration to my heart, Sam. You encourage me spiritually and personally. You were one of the first blogs I followed and while I love reading about all of your techniques for organizing, your sincerity is what I appreciate most.
Thank you so much, Robin.
What a joy it was for me to open my email and read this post. Thank you for sharing your heart, Sam. Being new to the blogging world, I am learning what you’re talking about on a more personal level. And I must say, I concur. I have no time for drama. Just relationships. I’m not here to please people, just Him. And I’d love to have friends along for the journey. Real ones. Who will share their heart. like you.
I’m so glad I stumbled upon your blog. And could care less if you’re on blogger . (I have even won one of your giveaways!) ;) Most importantly, I am blessed by your real glimpses of grace. You inspire me. Thank you.
Thank you, Nikki. This post was hard to write, and I fretted over how it would be taken. The kind responses are overwhelming.
What a lovely piece, Sam.
Thank you. <3
I enjoy your blog so much. I always have “good ideas” for blogging, but just never get on and do it. I don’t have that motivation, although perhaps I should on some topics. I like your style. I love that you have bad days, and I love that you get excited about sharing a great idea, or curriculum, or product with us! My family has been blessed by your blog through your review of curriculum . If we were, who else was? I don’t have an up to date blog, but I have facebook, and I love having real friends ;)
Thank you for saying those things. I share reviews because that is how I found curriculum, especially at the beginning. I don’t think we are FB friends-but you are welcome to add me. facebook.com/samkelley97
So extremely well said Sam! I have always stuck by my own personal motto of being who I am, telling it like it is, and both giving/taking the good with the bad. We are all human, and therefore imperfect, we should all support each other in this, build up, not tear down.
Agreed. Thanks for the encouragement. <3
I don’t want to hang out with Miss Perfect. :)
That’s good. You won’t find her here. :D
Thanks for being an encouraging friend….from far apart. :)
Thank you. <3
Amen! It’s so easy for a writer to say she is “keeping it real” but much harder to publicly admit her struggles. I truly admire and respect bloggers who show that they are works in progress, made perfect only through Christ. Sam, you do a great job of showing your genuine self while still encouraging and supporting others.
Thank you so much for your encouragement!
I love this post. You totally summed up all what I have been thinking and feeling. Only you wrote it much more eloquently that I could. :)
I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog and “getting” to know you.
May our blogger relationship continue for a long time.
As we give glory to Him first!!
Amen. Thank you, Sherri.
Girl, this was a great post!
I may have to quote you with this one:
“ I don’t read blogs who only have fabulous days. I read the blogs whose writers convict me one day, and hug me the next. Not the airbrushed ones.
We can’t be real friends if we aren’t going to be real.”
That was good.
Thank you, Amy. That means a lot. I believe those things with my whole heart.
You are real as they come. You demand that others be real, or be gone. That’s as Christ-like as it gets, to me. I love you! :)
Thank you, for always being my friend, above all else. You are amazing. I love you.
This is sweet! You are my friend…. I truly believe it! :)
Yes, I am. Thank you so much. <3
A wonderful post Sam!
Thank you! <3
Your blog has become my very favorite! What an amazing post…
That is the sweetest comment-even if I don’t understand how. Thank you.
Love this!! I have been thinking a lot about cutting back on my computer time, which would involve checking FB very little and not checking nearly as many blogs as I have been…so I’ve had some of the same thoughts on my mind and you put it beautifully. I’m glad you can be real for us. :)
I am making hours, something has to give. Thank you for your encouragement!
I teared up when I read this. Love it! I want to do a blog for the very same reasons, but I am not in a place where that is possible right now. I’ve attempted several times, but I get scared and quit. One of my biggest fears is giving too much information about my life that someone could use it in a negative way. The homeschooling aspect is the one I’m most wary of talking about. I will have to get over that. Hopefully I will be able to get one going soon. By the way, thank you for helping me by answering my questions and pointing me in the right direction to get the info I need. :)
I love reading your blog and your newsfeed is one of the few that I look forward to seeing on FB everyday. Thanks for sharing!!
Vanessa
Forget about all the other people! ((hugs))
Completely agree. And I’ve been writing about the same thing. Real is real. Perfect is an illusion, one that I got really tired of perpetuating. xoxo You bless me.
So glad we are friends!
Wow.
This was so awesome.
And real.
And I loved that… just like I love you.
Thank you for laying it out there.
And without even realizing it, answering a deep prayer of my heart.
Cryptic, I know. But trust me… it’s good.
*hugs*
I can deal with cryptic. ;) ((hugs)) right back!
Lovely, lovely. And I agree 100%. :)
Thank you.
AMEN Sam!I love your blog and how real you are. =)
kathy k
Thank you!
I love it! I came to your blog today and I hadn’t been by in a long time. I’m staring to get more open on my blog is well. Its hard at first but the truth of you will set you free.
I agree. Blessings.
Sam so beautifully written! I have a hard time too reading blogs who you so eloquently put it are “airbrushed”-
Thank you for being real and transparent – admitting we don’t have it all together is definitely something that can knit hearts together.
Sorry I’ve been such a flakey reader of your blog. I really need to make the effort to read my friends blogs and comment more. Thank you for being such a great encourager!
I’ll forgive the flakiness. Your schedule must be crazy!
I read your posts a lot, but very rarely comment. I’m happy and uplifted each and every time a woman has the courage to be real. We do so much harm to ourselves and our sisters by faking our way through life. Thanks for keeping it real!
Thank you-don’t be a stranger! <3
Sam,I love your post today. Thank you for being so open and real. You are a dear blessing to me!
Thank you, my friend. You bless me as well.
Oh this was so nice and honest! Thank you for being so open! This post was so refreshing and uplifting! Thanks so much for being real! I love you and love your blog!
Thank you so much. <3
Oh your post made my heart smile! Seriously. :)
Thank you, Sonita! <3
Thank you girl for this post. As I struggle to figure out the balance and voice, I was reminded today it is about being real. You confirm it and say it so perfectly — I’m clinging to what feels most genuine. Blessings.
http://positivelyalene.blogspot.com/
Thank you, Alene. <3
I love your blog and I feel as though I know you just from reading it :) I have been thinking of home-schooling my kids for a couple of years now but I keep stopping myself because my oldest son is a very good football player and I am so afraid that he will not be able to continue playing if I homeschool him. I am checking into it though. Wanna know my options.
I just wanted to thank you for all the little tips you have given through your blogs.. you have no idea how many times I have saved it to read later to my Husband. :D . Well that, and you family is the same size as mine 8 :D that is what first drew me to your blog!!
Love in Christ,
Amy
Thank you so much-I hope you decide to homeschool-you will never regret it. Even if you don’t, I’ll still be your friend. :)
Hi Sam,
I’m so grateful to have found you through the blogging world. Your are a treasure. I am blessed by your words and encouragement.
Hope to meet you in real life one day :)
Stacy
Me too. I wish it had already happened. Almost!
I know! I was looking forward to meeting you :) Are you planning any trips or conferences this year?
I agree with everyone else. I love reading your words and sharing in your days!
Thank you. <3
Great post! It’s always nice to read a blog where you feel like you might actually be friends with the person in real life if ever you were to meet them.
I agree. Nothing awkward. I love even the phone calls that feel like you’ve always done this. <3
Very well said! I love reading blogs and writing on my own. But I have found myself this year WAY too busy so it makes me sad I miss so much. There’s just not enough time in the day. But again thank you for the wonderful REAL you.
Thank you. Wonder if we could get a few more hours in each day?
Thank you for your time. Thank you for your transparency and I pray for you and your family for what the Lord needs you to have at that moment. He is in full control and it is sometimes hard to see that in the blessings and in the “others”. Sometimes the “others” are hard for us to see Him in but there He is.
Amen! I want Him to be much more visible than others!
What a great post! I’ve been doing a bit of blog reflection lately {the time of year, maybe?} and have been having some of the same feelings. I think when you’ve been doing this for a while {and you pass that point where it breaks many, and you keep going…}, it’s good to re-assess. Well, with anything really, but anyway…
It is so amazingly easy to get caught up in things such as follower numbers, number of comments, etc., and in the end, I personally don’t want to do it for those reasons. Those are superficial and flighty reasons; they won’t be around long. I’m enjoying blogging, don’t get me wrong, but I can tell I’m straying a bit from where I want to be.
It can be so depressing viewing the blogs that seem to highlight all the perfection present in the blogger’s life. I have to keep reminding myself that we don’t know what goes on behind closed doors, and we all have to give in some area of our life. They’re giving in an area I’m not. Still, it stings at times…
I’m glad I read this. It made me feel happy. :)
I’m happy that you are happy. :)
Well said!
Thanks. :)
IT is indeed a tremendous thing to be entrusted with the hearts of each other. you have definitely been an encouragement to me in the short time it has been since we first connected. Grateful for you friend and for how God is using you in your own life and others’. BLESS and be blessed!
Thank you, new friend. :)
Like what you said! Homeschooling is LIFE. There are ups and downs, good times and bad. Things didn’t always go smoothly when I homeschooled my own kids, but that experience sure has been a big help to me now that I am homeschooling my grandchild. My kids turned out well despite my own short-comings. That has made me more confident as I homeschool the next generation. God bless you, Samantha!
Thank you. <3
love you friend! :) Thank you for this!!!!!!!!!!
I love you too. <3
AMEN sista! Love ya!
Thank you. Love right back to you.
Sent from my iPad
Great post Sam! I feel the same way. When I first started blogging, I said I wanted a blog that showed the reality of homeschoolers. All the ones I had read portrayed perfection and left me feeling guilty, but now that I have become more established online, I have seen that it is not always true. Many people are indeed “real”. I know the pressure for WordPress too. LOL! I was one who started on WordPress and moved to Blogger a year later while everyone else was going the other way. I am glad I did. My audience (thanks to Google Search) exploded. I might have had more options with themes with WP, but as far as audience goes, blogger was the right choice for me. Have a blessed New Year! I am so glad I got to know you better at HHM.
Thank you, Tammy. I am so glad to know you as well. :)
Sent from my iPad
Simply put…I like you. :)
That is the sweetest thing ever. *blushing*
Great post Sam! Makes me wish I had kept my itty bitty blog with only 50 followers just because that’s where I can go to write about me and my home with the not so perfect life. I hope I show who I am on my Kinder blog and I am SO glad that I met up with you and others who participate in the 3 in 30. Have a great New Year and I hope to be reading more from you in 2012!
Laura
Did you delete it? You could always start another…if you feel you need your own-not school space. :)
I could re-open it if I wanted to. It was just hard for me to balance everything. I now co-author a weight loss journey blog with a few friends and I have a few more liberties with that one. So we’ll see how it goes. =)
So much relies on balance. Not always perfect, not always negative, up and downs… that’s what makes for a good friendship. No pressure, edifying one another, picking up where you left off… And now I am feeling like my comment is wandering and only making sense in my head. :) SO, I’ll stop now but wanted to let you know that you, my friend, have been heard. And I love what you say and how you say it– keep being yourself and keep being real!
You weren’t wandering! Thank you, for the lovely thoughts. I hope we meet one day!